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2:20 p.m. : 2002-08-20 : I'll Show Ya Bang!

One should never have to watch Love Hewitt on the Rosie O�Donnell Show pontificate about breaking chairs and tables at a pirate restaurant and then gush about not paying for it because she thought it was free, so the balding men upstairs paid I guess� and here I�ve seen it twice, sorry sot that I am. But all was not lost�she also made sure to give us a little taste of her stellar new album, Bare Naked. What is with this girl and her crazy absolutely unsexy but trying to be sexy song titles? Last time it was �Let�s Go Bang� which she laughed off with a whiny cringe, �There was supposed to be a dance that went with it. A dance. But it never happened.� Ok. So a dance called �The Bang� would immediately rectify a song title that Love of all people can certainly not pull off? I mean, Love probably knows how to have mediocre sex but she doesn�t seem like much of a fucker/banger. Madonna, I could see. But even she has a little more taste than �Let�s Go Bang.� The difference, of course, is that Madonna has some hand in her own songs. Hence �Erotica� as opposed to �Let�s Go Bang.� Poor Love. It must suck to be the puppet of balding men up in some fancy office who want to put their penis in you but instead settle for aural rape by forcing her to record such unsexy travesties as �Bare Naked� and �Let�s Go Bang.� Of course she probably doesn�t see it that way.

Oh but she�s such a nice, girl, really she is. She�s really just a nice girl from San Francisco who wants a nice boy like Bailey to notice her. She really is. And then when the boobies grew it was like, �Why can�t a nice boy like Bailey notice me for me, you know? And not just for my boobies, I mean, seriously.�

Speaking of Madonna, I watched Desperately Seeking Susan a couple nights ago with Julie and it was such a treat. Don�t hate me but I think I�d like to bring back the miniskirt with short leggings look.

It�s a lovely rainy grey day here in Cambridge. Maybe I�ll go see a movie at the Brattle.

Word of the Day for Tuesday August 20, 2002:

fettle FET-l, noun:

A state or condition of fitness or order; state of mind; spirits -- often used in the phrase "in fine fettle."

Aside from the problems with her voice... Miss Garland was in fine fettle last night. --Vincent Canby, "Judy Garland Sets the Palace Alight," [1]New York Times, August 1, 1967

Back in 1987, the Conservatives won a thumping majority in a June general election, primarily because the economy was seen by grateful voters to be in fine fettle. --Larry Elliott, "Danger of a recurring nightmare," [2]The Guardian, June 18, 2001

Many of the nuns were in fine fettle, even into their 80s and 90s. --John McCrone, �Sisters of mercy," [3]The Guardian, August 18, 2001

He seems in fine fettle when we meet, and happy to discuss the film that gave him his break. --Charlotte O'Sullivan, "Naked ambition," [4]The Guardian, February 7, 1999

Fettle is from Middle English fetlen, "to set in order," originally "to gird up," from Old English fetel, "a girdle."

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